


Lying in Her Arms

by novemberhush



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Almost as much as I hate myself for writing it, Angst, But this story wouldn’t leave me alone until I wrote it, Established Relationship, F/M, Honestly I don’t even READ cheating fics usually never mind write them, Infidelity, It’s all his fault, It’s inspired by an Anderson East song, I’m sorry, M/M, So have some Stiles cheating on Derek with Lydia and hating himself for it, Sterek Week 2018, Well not unless I write a sequel and I don’t have any plans to do that at the moment, Yes you read that right, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 12:42:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17244401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novemberhush/pseuds/novemberhush
Summary: Stiles has just made the biggest mistake of his life and he hates himself for it, but he knows he has to come clean to Derek. He owes him that much.





	Lying in Her Arms

**Author's Note:**

> I know, I know, I hate me too! Honestly, I broke my own heart writing this, but it (the muse, the story, the idea, my own sense of masochism, take your pick) wouldn’t leave me alone until I did. Inspired by an Anderson East song (it’s all his fault, but he’s so damn good, I swear, go check him out) of the same title, I originally had the idea to write this for the Marvey fandom (Mike and Harvey from ‘Suits’), but I never got around to it. Then I saw that the Sterek Week 2018 event over on tumblr had a ‘fics inspired by lyrics’ category and I knew I was gonna make my Sterek peeps suffer with me instead. I’m sorry! If you’d like to hear the heartbreaker that started all this you can listen to the song [here](http://youtu.be/k7XDc-rQQTc).

_ ‘Cause you were the only one I was holding/ And I was holding her close/ You were the only one I was thinking of/ Lying in her arms/ Throwing away our love _

 

It was a mistake. Of course it was. He’d known that even as it was happening. Hell, he’d known even before it happened. But that hadn’t stopped him. That stupid, useless urge to self-sabotage overrode everything else it seemed. Or maybe that was just another excuse. He had a whole list of them. 

 

He and Derek had been fighting constantly for months. When they weren’t fighting Derek had been acting cool towards him. Derek wouldn’t let him in, wouldn’t open up, kept pushing him away. He felt lonely even when Derek was right by his side. 

 

Excuses, all of them. He was a cheater now, that was what it boiled down to, and he knew Derek wouldn’t excuse him any more than he could excuse himself. He was weak, and insecure, and now he’d thrown away the best thing that had ever happened to him.

 

Derek didn’t know yet. Didn’t know that once again a lover he had trusted implicitly had just burned down everything he held dear. But he would know. Stiles owed him that, no matter how much it would hurt. He owed Derek the truth, the whole shameful sordid lot of it. Derek deserved to know what Stiles was really like. He deserved to walk away, clean and unsullied and free to find someone more worthy of him. And Stiles deserved to lose Derek.

 

She had caught him at his weakest. Another excuse, but one with truth to it. He’d tried to talk to Derek again, and again he’d been shut out. And then, there she was. Stiles had remembered how it had been before Derek, when she had been everything he thought he would ever want. Lydia Martin. His dream girl. Of course, back then he was still pretending, even to himself, that it was only girls who interested him. And, well, she was beautiful and intelligent and cutting and he couldn’t wait to bleed on her sharp edges. He was bleeding now all right, but not because of her. He’d ripped his own heart out, right along with Derek’s, and there was no tamping this wound.

 

The worst of it? The worst of it was he had been thinking of Derek the whole time. When he was kissing her, it was Derek he was kissing in his head. When he was holding her close, it was Derek he was holding. When he was moving in her, it was Derek he was joined with in his mind. And now here he was, lying in her arms. Bleeding out from a wound that could never heal, thinking only of Derek, and their love, and everything he’d just thrown away.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, if you made this far I thank you for taking a chance on my story. I know it wasn’t a happy one and I don’t expect it to get much love, but like I said, it wouldn’t leave me alone until I wrote it. The next one’s a happier one, I promise! If you feel like sharing your thoughts on the story, or just wanna scream at me, feel free to do so, either here in the comments section or over on tumblr where I’m also known as novemberhush. Thanks for reading. xxx


End file.
